There are so many reasons. You must be in a great deal of pain to ask this question so I’m going to be gentle with you.
Here are some possibilities of what has happened.
Option 1- They initially liked the you that you presented to them and put you on a pedestal. They liked the fantasized version of you but when you didn’t live up to their perfect expectations, they cut you off. They will likely do this again with their next relationship.
Option 2 - they initially genuinely liked you but you hurt them (unintentionally). They were too fearful to bring up the issues with you /were afraid of conflict and so cut you off. You could contact them and ask to talk about what happened but if this person is so bad at communicating to cut off a loved one, this is not something you can change. They need to seek therapy first which could take years or decades and maybe even never - they need to recognize a pattern and change. No words will make them see their ways. Plus by you contacting them, their ego will grow and you will make them feel more special about themselves. Don’t reward people who are cruel to you. Not something I recommend you do.
Option 3 - the other person can only handle ZERO drama and will cut off a situation that brings them any negativity. Simple conversations most couples handle, they are not capable of dealing with.
If they cannot communicate, a long term relationship with this person, like a marriage, would lead to divorce. Relationships to those kind of people are purely fun. When they are asked to toughen up and help out, they run scared of their own shadow (not someone you want around when they need to protect offspring or support you when you’re sick). A fair weather friend who is only there in good times is not someone a good person like you needs in a long term loving relationship (if that’s what you seek).
Option 4 - just a selfish human being who hops from person to person - does casual relationships and bullbutters their way into people’s hearts by lying about love and the future. Very common tactic from young boys.
Option 5 - Perhaps they are young and don’t have much empathy for you. They still need to grow up. Younger people have more narcisstic traits while their brain forms and matures. They also lack life experience and wisdom while young.
Option 6 - similar to option 4 but more common from older men and women. They manipulated you to make you feel loved when infact they were trying to get something from you like sex or money.
Option 7 - just a selfish asswipe - Were there any red flags along the way. Did this person seem more focused on themselves than others around them. Did they speak to waiters disrespectfully? Did they never get involved in something that helps others and only did things that helped themselves. Do you find they turn friends to foe regularly? Do they have very few, if any, long term friends or acquaintances? If you can relate, you now have some arsenal to avoid this pain next time.
Option 8 - Love bombing is a manipulation strategy practiced by so many evil people. Sometimes it’s just how they feel at the time (it’s genuine at the time) but mostly if they can cut you off with no explanation (known as ghosting), it’s just someone seeking out something from you. Love bombing isn’t exclusive to narcissists. It happens from many selfish people seeking something from others. It’s usually, status, a connection, short term companionship, sex and/or money they seek. They don’t even consider how you feel. Sometimes it doesn’t even cross their minds and if you bring it up with these people (which I have done), they blame the other person. “Too bad” is something I hear often. They will find anything to pass off the guilt to the person suffering.
You need to distract yourself. If you are after a long term relationship with someone, this person is the opposite to that. They cannot communicate and are selfish. It’s not your role to fix someone who is insecure.
Imagine having a family with this person and they leave you when you have children. Imagine the poverty and the heartbreak then - that usually opens up people’s eyes - there’s one thing you suffering but another seeing your future babies suffer. Perhaps what happened is a blessing in disguise.
Don’t feel you’ve been cheated. Feel you’ve been shown a good lesson and you are one step closer to being more assertive with who you give your love over to.
If you suffer more than necessary, that person wins.
If you contact them, you make them feel even better and you will lose the dignity and respect you have for yourself. Heartless people like this don’t need more ego boosting.
If they return, they may want to use you again. Remember this post and read it again.
The best way to show a ghoster what they are doing is wrong is to ghost them back.
My Blog may also be of assistance to anyone suffering heartbreak too.
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